You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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