Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
