I am spending my child support on dildos
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Randomize