I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
