just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
