Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize
