Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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