Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
