New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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