so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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