he shaved USA in his pubs
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Randomize
