he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
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