I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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