bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
she smelled like a LAN party
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Randomize
