I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
