Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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