If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I forgot how hot balto sounded
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
