the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I would fuck him just for his dog
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
