u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
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