Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
