You're completely useless in the revolution.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
I woke up under a house in Key West
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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