I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
