And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Randomize
