used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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