No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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