just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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