You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Randomize
