so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize
