covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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