It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
