Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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