Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize