He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
