I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
