So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize