How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize