you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
