i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
