I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
