on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Just puked most of my soul out..
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
