i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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