There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
