we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
