you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
