Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
