Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
