she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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