we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
