Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
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