that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
