I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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