I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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